Bipolar Heart.

As I blogged before I am living single in the city of bright lights. But lately ; the concept and talk of marriage and children , settling down - has gotten the best of me. IF you know me very well - you know this is not like me at all. I was the girl that said she did not believe in marriage ; or ever felt she wanted to get married. For a long ass time I did not believe in ROMANCE any more. Jerk after jerk ...you start to think chivalry is certainly dead. BUT its not ; and how do I know this ...cus I had an amazing boyfriend for 15 years ( whoa - i meant 15 months LOL ) that held my purse for me when it was heavy , opened doors at all times, moved me to the inside of the street, and waited outside my job with an umbrella when it was raining hard out. Came to show me that it is far from dead. I can sum this all up by saying ......maybe my I have had a change of heart about exchanging vows & sticking with someone for eternity.

There is hope in this world, Lol.


I have found the PERFECT pink ...

Its called " Chastity " from Essie !! <3 I fell inlove with it when I found it at my local nail salon ..and now plan on purchasing it asap.


Q-Tip & Currensy Perform "Lets Ride" Live With The Roots!


Now Playing ::

My bestfriend Brittany put me on to this song ; so I wanna thank her ;)


Sorry I have been a bad blogger ; but -- my computer got a virus ...now im on the search for a new one ; that I can take with me on my commutes daily around queens to brooklyn to manhattan back to queens. Lol. So it must be light. ALSO my lovely camera has a zoom error; aka it does not take any pictures. AKA I need a new camera also. "/ SUCKS. But lucky I am that Christmas is right around the corner.

So I started classes; its been great. I got great professors - and the classes are pretty interesting. I have became cool with some of the people in my classes too.

I was going through situations with my bestfriends ; and I am happy to say that is all cleared up . I know that slowly but surely we will be as tight as we were before anything.

Being single is tough .....especially when you did not break it off cus he was a douche. Lol. I miss him all the time, knowing I had someone there to speak to always. But we are still really good friends ....and that helps me keep going daily. I know that my reason for ending it will overshadow all that I feel. I dont think its the end of us , at all. Time apart will show that even more.

Work...its been only a week back, and I am happy with it. I am happy with my partner, with my kids. I am excited for all the great things we have planned and in store for our group of children.

Things have been going very ...very well ! I dont sulk and mope around at home any longer. Lol. I have all this energy and all this love every morning that I want to share it with everyone. I feel like slowly I am becoming me , the person I used to be before I let the devil play tricks with my head.

I will deff try to blog more , Anytime I can possibly steal my mothers computer. Haha. Love you bloggettes && all my followers <3


My Hubby !

If you know me you KNOW I am a huge fan of Joell Ortiz. NO NO NO not a groupie chick --- I analyze his lyrics ; and memorize em by listening to the song just once. Hes persona just adds to it. He does not act like hes the shit and no one can touch him ...he is very down to earth and not immature like most rappers now a days starting "beef" to gain fans.I actually got the concept of my first tattoo from one of his songs (a post of that soon!) I had a little moment when I tweeted a piece of lyrics from one of his joints...and he actually retweeted me - I must have been the happiest girl alive at that very moment. Haha. So if your a real " hip hop head " you know about this dude. If you dont - get on it.

Passion Pain & Pleasure.

Trey just does it for me ; always. He makes me feel sexy and confident --- and a great RnB artist can make you feel those kinda ways and even more. His songs just melt my heart - not just because oh hes cute ; or his voice --- which is amazing . BUT his lyrics are just on point. His metaphors and the way he finds a million different ways to say things. Baby making music ? Oh yes it is. Lol. He did it again for sure.

South Beach stole my heart !

So I have been back for a while now from my vacay. But havent posted the pictures I promised. Looking at all the pictures now; I sure do miss it. Stress free South Beach ... I will see you again soon for sure. Lol. I went for a week ; and stayed at the Park Central Hotel which is right on Ocean Drive .....aka right by everything & across from the beach. God is good ; it was suppose to be bad weather and all that - but it didnt rain once when we were there. It was all sunny skys & BLAZING heat. I got back and all I hear from everyone now is WOW you got SOOOOO dark. Lol. I did - I mean I did lay on the beach every single morning. Here are some pictures ; enjoy :)

Happy Birthday Lucas !

I cant express how much of an impact you made in my life with just one look. But on September 7th 2009 when I first laid eyes on you - I knew my life would be much sweeter. You grew so quick - day by day you gained a different characteristic that just made me love you even more by the minute. I think about you more than I think about anyone. I cant wait to see you grow even more ; into the great man I know you will be. You were my blessing in disguise. God knew I needed you to remind me every single day that my life is worth living. Happy 1st Birthday Crabbypatty <3

I am a Diva in Charge :) !

I have been blessed with the amazing opportunity to be working on a new project called Divas in Charge with my lovely co worker and friend Cynthia. If you didnt see my post on it before it is basically a all girls club for young girls going through the regular " pre teen/ teen " situations such as friend/ dating issues etc. Its a kind of guidance for them to build up their confidence and think positive to do positive things.

I am very excited to start it all up. Next week will most likely be our " Release Party " with the young girls. I am excited to be part of something that can touch and change the lives of many young girls in NYC. Make them feel like they do not need to look like the females on TV or magazines ; that they are beautiful inside and outside - just as long as they are being themselves and true to themselves.

This will be most DEFINATELY one of my biggest accomplishments.

Check out the sites for DIVAS IN CHARGE here --- >



Don Hills NYC

So I was told a while ago from a friend to check out a certain spot called Don Hills ; since I was in the process of putting together an event. I ended up going this week and I must say I LOVED the venue. The art was so NYC ; and just the positive vibe and the people there. I went to show support to some friends of mine ; since it was an open mic night. It was a great night. Sadly though I heard Don Hills will be going through renovation so they will be closed for now. I will deff be waiting till its available again though to start making moves on my event.

Ive been on autopilot since we last spoke ....

This song needed its own post. Just because its very important to me. Its one of my all time favorite GCH songs. The lyrics are just on point.

I see a window and all I can think about is, so do you wanna fly with me?
Do you wanna fly with me?
I know it sounds crazy but I can't find solid ground, so do you wanna fly with me?
Do you wanna fly with me?

And I been staring out this window for the past eleven hours, thinking of all the opportunities this window has to offer,
from the twenty third foor and a filing cabinent east manhattan and FDR is beautiful as I'm watching all the cars passing.
Then a couple stars twinkle so I started laughing and a couple walk by and they look so happy.
I booked this room at this place called the last resort, all my bags are packed, I got my jacket and my passort
and a first class ticket to the afterlife, you dig me?
Now is you is or is you is aint with me? And I fully understand if you've got other plans, but I can't see you hand in hand with another man. I been on auto-pilot since we last spoke,
and I don't wanna board this flight on a bad note.
I want you to think about it, but either way, I'm going and if you really love me, then here's your chance to show it.

I see a window and all I can think about is, so do you wanna fly with me?
Do you wanna fly with me?
I know it sounds crazy but I can't find solid ground, so do you wanna fly with me?
Do you wanna fly with me?
We'll live forever and maybe we'll write a novel about our love. We'll live forever and maybe we'll write a novel about our love.

She looked me dead in the eyes and took me by the hand,
kissed me on my cheek and said, Baby, listen I understand.
You don't have to leave, plus I'm scared of heights.
So just put down your luggage, and just forget this flight.
You and I, you know we been through a lot of things,
but it's no reason to start trippin' and arguing.
She said, you are my king and I place no one above you, and I don't have to board a plane for me to show I love you.
And all this talk about the afterlife is kinda creepy, so let's just go lay down and talk,
I'm getting kinda sleepy.
I kinda smiled and we both walked to the window, I pulled the shutters, started staring at the sky.
I wiped a couple tears away, then we loked at each other and I could see the stars twinkle in her eyes.
I told her about the couple that I saw earlier.
She said, I'm sure they were cute but they're no you and I.

I see a window and all I can think about is, so do you wanna fly with me?
Do you wanna fly with me?
I know it sounds crazy but I can't find solid ground, so do you wanna fly with me?
Do you wanna fly with me?
We'll live forever and maybe we'll write a novel about our love.
We'll live forever and maybe we'll write a novel about our love...


I remember when gym class heroes first came out with the queen and I. Nobody really knew of them ; and I found them randomly on myspace. I started listening to the songs they had on their page and automatically fell in love with their lyrical presence. Then on after they started to become more known and their songs made it on the radio - they just kept getting better and better. Man ; I miss this kind of music. Every song they have you have to really sit and listen to the lyrics ; analyze every verse ..because its never really about what you think its about. I love music that can make you think ; and keep you wondering what the true meaning within the song is. Travis just needs to step off his pedestal and come back to GCH. Sorry ; thats just my opinion.