Critical Condition..

Im back :) I have been SO busy with working two jobs, and gettin everything set and ready for Jace to arrive. Its been a very long week too ! But I decided to post something real quick. I decided what I am going to start doing whenever I can is write about a specific sex and the city episode, and speak on it through my experiences and my opinions. Cus why not ? Lol. I have been a huge sex and the city fan thanks to my mother for putting me on to it when I was about 12 years old. Of course there were many parts where she made me cover my eyes, lol. Plus I definately did not relate to it as much as when it was probably the finale season. But I have been a loyal fan, and will always be. I went to watch the SATC movies the day before showing, at 12Am on the dot, both were on my birthday weekend too. It was great....I ended up going to the theatres to see it about 4 times & now I have the movies on DVD to watch whenever, and always. Lucky boyfriend of mine huh ? Lol.

Neways , I watched the episode titled : Critical Condition, from season five. It is about when Carrie is waiting for her book to get reviewed by the new york times. She goes out, and she ends up bumping into the lady that went out with Aidan ( her ex that she basically ended things with because it was just too perfect for her ) after her. She starts to over analyze things because of a face she made. She took it as though she was being judged by the relationship they had, and he probably told her how she messed him up. It starts to really affect her because she feels like she was nothing but good to him , it just was not what she wanted in a relationship, and she had to let him go...no matter how great he was.

I know how it feels to really care about what others think about your past relationships. I remember I was with a great guy who treated me amazing. There was just something missing , and I could not pin point the problem but I knew I couldnt fake it any longer. I had to end things, and I knew the constant questions about why I did it , and how great he was will start flowing right in. I knew many did not agree with my decision, because of how heart broken he showed everyone he was. Our mutual friends would always ask me about giving him a second chance, and I hated sounding like a bitch when I would say... I just cant, I dont like him ...like that. There comes a point in a relationship where I feel you just know your atleast going to fall hard, and inlove with that person. I got so far into it, and still did not feel it ... that made my decision what it was. It bothered me all the time , wondering if his friends hated me, or his family which genuinly loved me as soon as they met me. I started to feel like the biggest bitch in the world...I ruined his life, and what not. It was a tough thing to deal with because I never wanted to be the "bad person" but I was in most people's eyes. I guess it also did not look so great on my part since two months later I had a new boyfriend I was super happy and elated with.

After a while of feeling like crap, I realized I had to do what was best for me. Sure, it was kind of stingy to think of my feelings first...but at the end of the day you have to worry about you first, always. Life goes on..and I went through a heartbreak before him, and knew how hurt he must have been....but I also knew there is such thing as moving forward and living your life as though it never happened. It becomes a memory after a whole, and no longer a tragedy.

He got into a new relationship, which he was very happy and with the girl for a while. So it proved my point, and showed everyone that what happened was meant to happen. I didnt need to over due myself to show people I was not in the wrong all the time. Luckily I can say that me and him stayed friends, though it took us a while to get to that point. He let go of the grudge and learned to finally really forgive me for all the hurt I caused him. I am happy to say that now me being in a relationship, and so as he is , we still keep it friendly and caring. Everything happens for a reason and I guess we both see that now.

1 showing love:

Lais said...

Same thing happened to me. The guy was sweet and everything but I couldn't see him more than just a friend. He said some not so great things to me. He is now in a relationship and happy. It was meant to be that way. She can't force yourself to be with someone you are not feeling because you don't want to hurt them. Makes the situation so much worse.