6.26.2010

Letter Day 2.

To my crush : The boyfriend ♥

Well ; he is obviously more than a crush. So there will be two parts to this letter. One will be written as the person I was before; when he was my just my crush more than a year ago. The 2nd part will be where I am at now ; as his girlfriend.

I find myself liking you more and more each day. But I just dont feel I am ready for a relationship where I am at right now. I can be a difficult person to love ; and I dont want to become your downfall. I feel the butterflies ; and you make me nervous. But they say thats a good thing. I dont want to bring my walls down though ; because I know your young - and you cant already know what you want out of life. But part of me is saying to give it a shot ; and just tell you how much I like you. I want to thank you for not being like all the other guys. You have yet to make a move on me ; and you speak to me so sweetly. You sit there and listen to me speak ; and babble on subjects that you probably could care less about - but I see you listening ; and really paying attention to me. I see the light in your eyes when you stare at me - like I am all you see. Or is it just me ? I think you like me ; I think I feel it ....but I know we have both said we are not looking for anything serious right now. I just wish I had the guts to tell you I might be changing my mind.

Its been a year since we started speaking ; a year since I realized I was crushing you. A great year ; of love; support; happiness; laughter; and fun. I am still VERY difficult to love - but I think you understand me - you got it down packed by now. Lol. I appreciate your patience. I appreciate that you can handle my truth. I appreciate that you have never tried to change me. You have helped me mature ; you have helped me open my eyes to things that blocked me before in life from succeeding. I know that no matter what happens in life I will always and forever have a friend in you; and that is the greatest thing you can get out of a relationship. You have never disrespected me ; or played me for a fool - & thats what makes you different. You took the risk; and made the leap into loving me & it made me a stronger person to do the very same. I still cant believe that this day last year was the day we met - the day we sat across from each other. The day you asked me my age ; and where I was from. Lol. Soon it will be a year that we officially became a couple - the day I let my guard down & decided to make that leap with you. & I dont regret it not one bit. I love you Robert ♥

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